Nervous at the Beginning

5 Aug 2012

One of my friends remarked, “It’s sad that you barely get a break.” I had two days in-between taking Step 2 and leaving for Guatemala. Yet I feel as if I’m getting a year-long break from the rat race that is med school. I have a year to absorb as much Spanish as I can, to see what healthcare is like for those with a lack of opportunity, and to make my decision to put off “real life” worth it.

On my layover in the Houston airport on route to Guatemala my mind is coursing with lack-of-sleep worries. Will I find my way from Guatemala City to Xela? Will all my bags make it? Will I learn Spanish? Enough to justify a year? And, as always, will people like me?

Arms on the table tremble with nervousness and I am not sure why. I have wanted this for so long. I suppose I am worried that whatever happens will not live up to the experience I have imagined. There’s also fear. I am scared of this new place where the unknown awaits.
That and I need some sleep after the red eye from California. I am going to buy a jamba juice (my last one for a year?) and be happy. I have somehow misplaced my sense of adventure, and I’m determined to find it again.

 

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